Celebrating “Yester-Times”    November 23, 2017

Connecting means bonding! Connecting with young children is challenging, as most young kids are so active, it’s hard to find something you can do together that’s memorable, even when you are with them. To establish a connection, first you need to interact in meaningful experiences together. This is important! If two individuals (an adult and a child, or even two adults) don’t experience meaningful activity together, it’s difficult to connect on a personal level.

When distance and time separates everyone, it’s hard to build and maintain a connection. If you can connect from common experiences you interacted in together, it’s easier to establish a bond that lasts a long time! Many grandparents have participated in everyday activities with grandchildren such as going to the grocery store, making breakfast together, blowing bubbles, or visiting the zoo. Once these activities are over and grandma or grandpa leave, young children quickly move on to the next thing, and forget about special times they’ve experienced with their grandparent. How can memories be created that last and let kids remember who they experienced them with?

When distance and time separates everyone, it’s hard to build and maintain a connection.

There’s no question that reading to young children is a great way to engage with them. It’s also a perfect way to establish a strong connection, even when you’re a long-distance relative. Several years ago, we had a somewhat different take on this idea when we created the Sticking With Family® book series – we wanted to connect with our grandson to make memories that would last a long time.

The word “Yester-Times” was actually invented by our grandson, Beckett. It happened following a holiday visit when we were preparing to leave Beckett’s home. As Beckett viewed photos of past visits from several months earlier, he lit up and became extremely excited. Trying to find the right words, he said… “Grammy, just remember the “Yester-Times.” It was his way of telling us he remembered past visits and had great memories of activities we’d participated in together!

We are Rick and Angela Blesi, and are long-distance grandparents ourselves. During the long drive home following this visit, we wondered how our two-and-a-half-year-old grandchild would remember his grandparents, as he only saw us four or five times a year. Kids are so busy and active that we believed Beckett probably would just go to the next ….

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Celebrating “Yester-Times”

Grandparents, this is all about YOU!

CONNECTING.    long-distance grandparents with grandchildren

Every grandparent feels a connection with their grandchildren. But when you’re only able to see them once in a while, it’s difficult to create a close relationship and stay connected.  Grandparents who don’t live near their grandchildren (aka long-distance grandparents) struggle to develop close bonds with their grandkids!

Several challenges grandparents face in connecting with grandchildren include: job-related travel, families that move to different areas of the country, divorces and separations, as well the fact that everyone is extremely busy. In today’s hectic world, it’s difficult to maintain a close connection and bond with young grandchildren you don’t often see.

Connecting means bonding! It’s a challenging task, as young kids are so active, it’s hard to find something you can do together that’s memorable, even when you are with them. To establish a connection, first you need to interact in meaningful experiences together. This is important! If two individuals (an adult and a child, or two adults even) don’t experience meaningful activity together, it’s difficult to connect on a personal level.

As mentioned earlier, many grandparents are not part of their grandchildren’s daily lives. Additionally, when distance and time separates everyone, it becomes more difficult to first build, and then maintain a connection. If you can connect from common experiences you interacted in together, it’s much easier to establish a bond that lasts a long time!

Many grandparents have participated in everyday activities with grandchildren such as going to the grocery store, making breakfast together, blowing bubbles, or visiting the zoo. Once these activities are over and grandma or grandpa leave, young children will quickly move on to the next thing, and forget about special times they’ve experienced with you. How is it possible to re-live fun activities and help kids remember who they experienced them with?

That’s the reason STICKING WITH FAMILY^® books were created. When you’re a long-distance grandparent and your visit ends, how can you get a young grandchild to remember you and the special activities you’ve experienced together? Do you buy a coffee mug with a picture on it, or a tee-shirt that says…” I LOVE GRANDMA”?  Or, maybe purchase a new teddy bear to give them before you leave? How about a story book that has their name printed in it?

We don’t believe any of these gifts create closeness, as there’s nothing that connects an experience with the people who participated in the activity (grandparent + grandchild). However, three key factors can greatly enhance the ability to connect:

• Recall special activities you’ve experienced together
• Provide a means to identify participants in those activities (photo stickers)
• Allow the participants to interactively build a unique story about their adventures

When children “stick” photo stickers in a book of someone’s face they recognize that re-tells stories of fun times spent together, a close bond is created. It’s an interactive experience that connects two people! Young kids don’t recognize words printed in a book, but they will readily remember fun times with face stickers and illustrated stories about themselves and their grandma or grandpa.

The focus of our books is to have the adult read (and embellish on) each story page. Then, your grandchild “sticks” photo stickers on each page to complete the stories. This way the two of you develop your own special narrative about time spent together, and create a special book about your adventures. When your visit ends, your grandchild has a book that’s filled with photo stickers and activities you experienced together.

Long-distance grandparents will find these books create a bond and a connection that’s difficult to break, even when the participants don’t see each other every day. Grandkids can have the book read to them over-and-over again and they will always remember their grandparents and fun things they did together! This makes these books a great gift that will create long-lasting memories and be meaningful for a long time!

Happy grandparenting!

Grandparents, this is all about YOU!

Close your eyes for a moment! Now go back to your collection of memories and take a step back in time to your childhood.  Do you remember your grandfather’s bear hugs when he let you walk on his feet around the kitchen?  Or sitting by your grandmother’s side as she lovingly baked cookies, pies, and cakes in the kitchen.

Are you a grandparent? Are you a long-distance grandparent?  It’s difficult being close to your grandchildren in this busy, rushed world we live in today.  Especially with long-distance grandparents, how can you form close bonds with grandchildren when you are so seldom together? The bond between a grandparent and grandchild seems to be a magical one when it happens!

Research indicates there’s more to attachment than the amount of time parents and children spend together. Even more so, the same principles apply with grandparent and grandchildren bonds. Lifelong attachments between grandparents and grandchildren can form even with relatively short periods of contact, as long as they can participate in meaningful activities together.

Before we take a trip to visit our grandson we get so excited planning games, events, etc.  Grandpa Rico spends hours and hours at the Dollar Store and on the internet coming up with every concoction he can find to make experiments with Beckett. Colored vinegar and baking soda can make wonderful experiments. It’s fascinating how many hours go by mixing and stirring and laughing when he and Grandpa Rico create new concoctions together.  

Grammy (that‘s me) loves to read with him, giggle, and play make-believe.  We love chasing our shadows on the ground and finding troll faces in the trees as we walk together. We also sing together, but “shhhhh”, nobody can listen until we get our songs memorized!

Reading and sharing quiet time seems to be one of our most precious moments in caring for Beckett, especially at bed time.  He loves creative, make-believe stories and enjoys hearing about our experiences when we were his age. We also can see things on the ceiling from his night light shining at different angles. 

What are your loving memories when you have quality time with your grandchild or grandchildren? When we get in the car to drive back to our home, he always says, “I love you guys!” That’s when we think it’s the most special!

Please share your stories on our Sticking With Family website in the “Contact Us” tab on our menu. We are also on Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest, and would love to hear from you with any special stories!

Happy Grandparenting!